Missing her

In January it was five years since my sister died. God has designed time to heal our broken hearts. But for some reason, the last few days she has been on my mind. I miss her. Almost as much as I did five years ago. The pain is no longer sharp but a dull ache that throbs.

I wish I could hear her laugh again. I wish I could see her eyes light up with joy at the sight of her husband or one of her children. I wish I could see her creativity in action one more time. I wish I could see her chew the inside of her mouth as she ponders something. I wish I could have a good long chat with her. I wish she could have met my children and that they could have met her. I wish I could hold her hand again – she has such beautiful, long fingers. I wish I would have enjoyed the times we had together more fully. I wish there was more left for me besides tears and treasured memories.

Then I remember…I will hear her laugh again. We’ll have all of eternity to talk. I’ll hold her hand again. I’ll feel her arms around me again. I do have more than tears and memories…I have the promise of reunion.

I remembered a song today (sung by Jeff and Sheri Easter.) It fit my melancholy feelings so well…

We said our last “I love you” as we held each other tight.
With years of tender feelings overflowing from our eyes.
Now here I am with memories, all alone, with no regrets.
And that’s as good as goodbye gets.

You did a lot of living as you walked these earthly miles.
It’s funny, though I’m crying,
still somehow, I have to smile.
Cause your life, your love, your laughter, touched everyone you met.
And that’s as good as goodbye gets.

There’s a deep, deep sadness that comes with letting go.
Even though I’m grieving, there is peace; there is hope.

Cause everyone who knew you, knew the heartbeat of your days,
Your eyes were fixed on Jesus, now you’re finally face to face.
And I’ll join you there in heaven, when my last sun sets.
And that’s as good as goodbye gets.

I’m longing for reunion! Lynnae, you may be gone from our sight, but not from our hearts!